From the Hearty by Shelley Turner

This week, my youngest graduated from high school. We spent the day celebrating this achievement, first with pomp and ceremony and later with a steak dinner. His two older brothers had made the effort to spend the day with him, and it was fun to hear the three of them swap stories about their time at the same high school. Interestingly, although many of the teachers and program details have been the same for each boy, what each has taken away from his high school experience has been quite different.

As I contemplated the three of them together, and the passage of time that little scene represented for me, I remembered something a friend said years ago, something along the lines of “All these years I thought I was raising my children, but really, my children were raising me.” It’s true. I have certainly become a better person than I started out to be—stretched to the max in every capacity to love and to pray for and to suffer deeply for others, as well as to forgive and to see beyond and to have faith—because of those boys.

Like my boys at Commencement, I often find myself swapping stories with friends about our life experiences and the things we’ve taken away from them. And we often lament the fact that after gaining all of this wisdom “the hard way,” no one—especially our children—seems that eager to benefit from it! As the last one goes off to college, I’m struck by the realization that there isn’t anything new I can tell or teach my children at this point in their lives. In God’s school system, they will learn wisdom the way we all do—by their own experience. Perhaps the best gift I can give them is simply to keep my covenants all my life. And honestly, that is the best gift they could give to me.

My children aren’t the only ones who play a part in raising me. Over the years there have been many, particularly among the members of the 7th Ward. Truth be told, I have sustained a great deal of personal growth here in your midst, and intend to keep on learning with you and from you for as long as I can. The best way I can think of to say “thank you” for your love and support and acceptance, and for your long-term investment in me is, again, simply to keep my covenants all my life. And honestly, that is the best gift you could ever give to me.